Depression has become part of my music, and music part of the depression
Speaking out about mental health and encouraging conversation around it is part of In Earnest's creative process. Singer Sarah talks about her personal relationship with depression and their debut single 'Put Me Under'.
I suffer from chronic anxiety and depression to the point where I can't hold down jobs or be left alone for too long. In my loneliness, I am awash with negative thoughts. The song is about feeling overcome by an invisible illness, but knowing it's a lot easier to cope in the company of a dog.
When I wrote the song, I was really struggling with how debilitating depression and anxiety are. I wanted to include an honest account of how my mental health affects every part of my life from career to relationships to my daily routine and everything in between. The song is also about how dogs are such a massive part of my life and how they have essentially helped me combat loneliness.
Writing music serves a therapeutic purpose for me. I'll go months without writing anything, and when I really need an outlet, lyrics will flow out of me. Depression has become part of my music, and music part of the depression.
Even ten years into the struggle of Generalised Anxiety Disorder and chronic depression, I'm still learning about my mental health and how to train my brain to steer away from negative thoughts. It's always going to be a work in progress, and I have come to accept that it will be part of me forevermore.
The next single will be a song called 'Come Upstairs', which is written from Tom's (bandmate and boyfriend) perspective on how he copes with me and my mental illness. Both of the singles will then be part of a 6-track EP that we hope to release later this year.